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I’m Grumpy

Every time someone (who I assume or know is a meat-eater) posts something about animal rights, ESPECIALLY something about typically farmed animals… I immediately comment on it all excited asking them if they’re veg/vegan too.

It’s my passive-aggressive way of calling them a hypocrite.

Oh, you think it’s cute and happy when Dairy cows are released from their confinement, and get to live in a nice field because of some amazing people, instead of being sent to slaughter? Oh cool, STOP DRINKING MILK AND EATING ANIMALS THEN.

Except, I can never actually open with that, cuz what if the person actually is vegan and I just didn’t know it yet.

I just get so mad at the hypocrisy. The disconnect. How stupid people are. How ignorant. How blind they are to the impacts of their actions.

I get mad. I get frustrated. I just want this shit to end and there’s nothing I can do to end all the suffering I know is going on around me every second of every day from every angle.

Sorry guys, guess I’m having a bad night.

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Status Symbol

Leather has always been seen as a status symbol. It used to be for the rich, the people who have money to flaunt. It was something I wanted, something I thought would make me cool. I always wanted a Fossil purse, I got excited when my friend gave me a hand-me-down wallet, I was thrilled when I found a bargain on a jacket in a Value Village.

And then I saw Earthlings. And then I saw pictures posted by friends at Toronto Cow Save of skins coming out of the factory, steaming in the winter chill from being so recently on their owners. And then I saw them in person when I finally had the courage to go. The white parts of the cows hides weren’t white. They were red, almost indistinguishable from the black/brown parts they were so covered in blood.

Before I started seeing these things, I knew I wasn’t going to be buying any more leather, but I figured I’d be okay to keep using the things that I already had around the house. Mainly my moccasins. I haven’t worn them in months though. Not since Earthlings.

Then last night I went to write in my journal, something I have not done in a while, and really ought to be doing on a regular basis. I paused before I went into my room, realizing that my journal was leather… I tried to talk myself into believing that it was faux, so I’d be okay to keep using it. But I couldn’t trick myself into believing it. I wanted to though. I looked up ways to distinguish faux from real on the off chance that it actually was faux, but after smelling it; I knew. I was repulsed. Recoiled from it after that sniff, I couldn’t have it that near my face.

What a change, eh? I went from looking at leather with awe, wishing that I could have certain things that I could not afford, to being repulsed and saddened and seeing horrifying images in my mind.

But leather is still a status symbol.

It is no longer a symbol of your wealth, it is now a symbol of your character. When I see leather on the streets, I do not see people with expendable income, I see people with disconnected lives. I see people enjoying their ignorance. We all know that leather is cow skin. But we aren’t taught that leather was A COWS SKIN. We don’t acknowledge the death that took place for that jacket, wallet, purse, or pair of boots. We just want to be seen as having that cool thing that everyone wants.

So I’m aiming for a new social recognition that I’d like to be a part of. I don’t want to be seen as “cool” or “rich” or anything like that (not that I ever was anyways, but, I can’t lie: I always wanted it) anymore. I want to be seen as compassionate. And that’s not a “look”… that’s a “do.”

 

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Change in Focus

Lately I’ve been noticing things more and more. Or, only noticing meat. I was walking to school one morning, and I walked past someone eating a burger from McDonalds… and literally all I saw when I walked past her was the meat. All my eyes saw were the burger. It was like a special camera effect in a movie, my eyes literally were only seeing the meat, the person holding it was blurry and not visible to me. I shuddered. I’m not really sure what else I have to say about this, as it was a really weird experience for me, but I just wanted to put it out there.

Notably of late, I’ve been getting more vocal with stuff with my friends on facebook. I have a classmate who is very sweet and does excellent things rehoming dogs and loves horses and talks about her love of animals in general, but can’t be vegetarian because she’s super anemic. But then she does things like post a picture of bacon, eggs and asparagus saying “gotta start the day off right!” This is not long after me posting my pictures from the pig save vigil where she said “this is so sad, it’s a good thing I had a fully veggie day today!”  and posts a video of How it’s Made about egg production (which was actually exceptionally mild yet she “couldn’t express how upsetting” it was to her…). My unacknowledged response was “I’ll have the asparagus.” What really annoyed me was the proximity to her other posts and remarks. But it gets worse…

Shortly after that, she posts something about “the three reasons why bacon is better than true love.” I had a witty response, “You forgot the word ‘tempeh’!” to which she responded that tempeh could count to, and I expressed that I really had meant more as an alternative to bacon, not alongside bacon. One of the reasons she posted why bacon was better than true love was that love is fleeting, but bacon stays in your heart (arteries) forever. I posted a picture of pigs on a truck saying that “Bacon is sticking in my heart even more-so now that I am not eating meat.” No one else said anything after that.

I’ve started posting more things about how cute piggies are and how I could never eat them again. And today I shared something a friend posted how cows basically dancing on their way out to pasture after being stuck in the barn all winter. I’m starting to post more. And later today, when she gets off work, I’m planning on telling my friend who I’ve been worried about telling. She’s an “ex-semi-vegetarian” and she things veganism is “excessive”, that “cows like being milked because it relieves them” and that “chickens are going to lay eggs no matter what so eating them doesn’t harm them” … I had mentioned to her before I’d made any changes that I was considering things and starting to think more about what I was eating. So I’m obviously worked up about telling her, and she tends to have big reactions to things. But once she’s said her little rant about why she thinks my decision is silly, I’ll be able to tell her the actual reasons behind my decisions and hopefully she won’t have any objections… not that that would change me obviously, would just make my life a little nicer.